Fatigue was so obvious in my eyes. Yet sleep was far away despite the fact it had been five hours in bus without dozing for a minute, suffice to this the last night spent tossing and turning in bed. Examinations are a real nightmare.Thank God this last paper of "History of Economic Thought" didn't turn out to be that bad. I hadn't planned to go back home "this" early but last night message from home said it was an emergency.
I had been dreading this hour since i got the news. If only i could find some escapade from what awaited inside! I took a real time standing at the gate of my house,gathering some courage to step in.Finally, with a sigh i made my way inside, wishing there could be a miracle waiting all along.
I saw mom lingering to some trivial chore.There was a flicker of smile or it was just what i thought ,anyways I didn't say any word just like every other time. Dragging my suitcase i went in my sister's room.
The door was ajar. I stood there, grabbing some courage, processing the view inside. The knots in my stomach tightened what i saw, my feet became heavy and fixed to the spot, my throat all choked up with tears flowing out vigorously. I suppressed a sob, lest i should wake her up from sleep. "she's fine.Go meet her.She's been asking for you", mom said all of a sudden from behind.
I went in wiping away the tears. I sat beside her on the bed and held her hand silently. Memories of past made way for the tears. I couldn't stop so i let the grief out. She still had that rakhi, the one I'd tied on her wrist. We never had a brother.Since children, I'd been tying to her,for we never wanted to be devoid of this affectionate gesture. True to her word, she had always been my guide in every aspect.I would tell her of my wrongdoings and she would "save" me from the scoldings.Nobody ever knew that it was me who had broken the plates and not Zoofie. Poor tail wagger got punished for the crime it never committed!
When i had my breakup, she consoled me as i cried all through night.
She had been my friend and mother all through her life and i was feeling so miserable watching her die.
My sobs woke her up.She smiled a little and with some effort and my help shifted her head in my lap; the way i placed in hers when i needed some comfort. I caressed her hair. I felt her tears flowing the way mine were finding some release. She was vulnerable and weak! I'd never seen her failing like that. Watching her then was the most terrible thing. If only i could lessen her pain...only if..
We kept sitting in the comfort of each other for a long time.For time was what we didn't have.
We knew she wouldn't survive.Doctors did tell us long way back about the cancer that taken roots inside.But what we didn't expect was it would come so abruptly!! The "Monster" claimed her entirely. She left us after two days.She was finally rid of the disease, but left me all alone with no one for me in this world.
Mother was there but i always hated her for "some" reason all through my life. I never talked to her directly.Her death bought me close to my mom. She took me in her embrace and i kept crying against her bosom.The ill will and animosity of all those years got washed in that grief. I needed her desperately and she me likewise.We held on to each other and wept for the loss we shared.
I was hoping for some miracle right to the end. And it did happen. My sister didn't survive but she became the reason of our "truce". She had always spread love when she was alive and even in death, she became a miracle and made sure i wasn't alone after her.
